SCRIPT: "Marsha, The Queen of Diamonds" by Tom Cannan, Jr, and Jack Cash

General goings on in the 1966 Batman World

Moderators: Scott Sebring, Ben Bentley

Post Reply
User avatar
bat-rss
Posts: 2
Joined: Sun Apr 05, 2015 5:27 am

SCRIPT: "Marsha, The Queen of Diamonds" by Tom Cannan, Jr, and Jack Cash

Post by bat-rss »

Happy new year!

This Thursday morning US time, we're recording a TO THE BATPOLES on this unused Marsha script - presumably the one that Stanford Sherman was hired to rewrite, if by "rewrite" you mean "take the same villain and write a completely different story about her"!

Sorry for the short notice, but if you have time to peruse this in the next 72 hours and have some comments, we may quote them on the show!

Read the Script
"I'm half-demented with whimsical outrage!"
-- The Joker, in a line cut from "The Joker's Epitaph"
User avatar
Scott Sebring
Site Admin
Posts: 402
Joined: Wed Jul 25, 2012 5:50 pm

Re: SCRIPT: "Marsha, The Queen of Diamonds" by Tom Cannan, Jr, and Jack Cash

Post by Scott Sebring »

First comment I can think of when first reading it, "Man, Gotham has a lot of bridge ceremonies between this one and Bookworm's."
Wow, a pretty terrible script of mindless actions just to move from one point to another. She sweet talks her way through the parole board only to go right out and fire a laser beam and then send Batman a card to invite him to her lair? All this to get the ball rolling or rather flopping downhill as it deflates further and further only to sludge its way to an end. Other than Robin figuring a clue about a card, the dynamic duo are presented with everything mindlessly and waltz their way from one scene of dialogue to the next. The dialogue of the regulars is really flat and all in all don't fit the character saying them as we know them by this point of the series. Especially Batman and Robin. Translate this as "terrible writing" or "not knowing who you're writing for" or "Have you ever WATCHED the show?"
A few of the numerous nitpicks would include (busting out my Bat-Lorenzo-Powered-Highlighter-Pen):
1) The ceremony at the bridge would not be handled by a commissioner but rather a mayor.
2) Commissioner Gordon trying to call Batman on a two way radio. He's just got the bat phone. This would be Robin with his Bat Radio from his utility belt or back at the Batcave.
3) Robin stays at the commissioners office and not home base like the Batcave but then has his own Batacycle already waiting for him outside the office (insert head slap).
4) "Leaping Lumbago" would be "Holy Lumbago" for any beginner writing a Robin line
5) Batman is constantly reacting to other people's dialogue for direction. Robin has more deciphering and starting/leading in dialogue than Batman. Batman is literally a sheep being herded through this adventure. Hell, Robin is even driving the Batmobile with Batman as a passenger.
6) This almost makes Black Widow's mind control practically seem like Shakespeare by comparison.
7) UNDERWATER BATMOBILE! (by this point in the script, my head is already sore from all the head slaps)
8) Batwing firing missiles at an orbiting satellite sequence. These writers just seem to be new Bat-vehicles heavy and Batman being Batman short.
9) O'Hara doesn't even get one "Begorah"
10) Aunt Harriet only shows up for the last two lines in part two. Holy shoehorned like the rest of this story!

Somebody needed to scrap this script for sure. There was really nothing here to genuinely run with.
Image
User avatar
AndyFish
Posts: 0
Joined: Mon Sep 03, 2012 6:42 am

Re: SCRIPT: "Marsha, The Queen of Diamonds" by Tom Cannan, Jr, and Jack Cash

Post by AndyFish »

Haven't read the script yet but Marsha being two of my least favorite episodes it's good to know it could have been worse! Great summary Scott!
User avatar
High C
Posts: 0
Joined: Mon Sep 03, 2012 8:01 am

Re: SCRIPT: "Marsha, The Queen of Diamonds" by Tom Cannan, Jr, and Jack Cash

Post by High C »

There is not much I can add to Scott's excellent critique.

I will echo it and add this--Not only is it absurd that Batman lets himself be captured by Marsha without any failsafes or backup plans (although, to be fair, there were none in Sherman's rewrite either, other than his own will power), it is as dull a hypnosis scene as one can imagine. Not only is Batman passive throughout, as Scott said, the character is WAYYYY off from what he has been established as. He is completely unprepared. Batman is 'overwhelmed by her dazzling beauty.' Nope. Never. Not how he rolls.

The characters' dialogue is completely off all throughout the arc, and why would a woman interested in diamonds, electronics and ray guns have henchmen named after--checks notes--slang boxing terms???

Peggy Shaw's unproduced Catwoman script was interesting. Jay Thompson's Dr. Temporal script was absurd and never could have been filmed, and it wasn't really '66 Batman, but it was a weird enough yarn to keep me scrolling.

This was unsalvageable.

Also, no way Dick gets cookies until after dinner. ;)
'I thought Siren was perfect for Joan.'--Stanley Ralph Ross, writer of 'The Wail of the Siren'

My hobbies include gazing at the Siren and doing her bidding, evil or otherwise.

'She had a devastating, hypnotic effect on all the men.'--A schoolmate describing Joan Collins at age 17
User avatar
Scott Sebring
Site Admin
Posts: 402
Joined: Wed Jul 25, 2012 5:50 pm

Re: SCRIPT: "Marsha, The Queen of Diamonds" by Tom Cannan, Jr, and Jack Cash

Post by Scott Sebring »

High C wrote: Wed Jan 05, 2022 10:19 pm Also, no way Dick gets cookies until after dinner. ;)
I know! Right?!!
Image
User avatar
High C
Posts: 0
Joined: Mon Sep 03, 2012 8:01 am

Re: SCRIPT: "Marsha, The Queen of Diamonds" by Tom Cannan, Jr, and Jack Cash

Post by High C »

Scott Sebring wrote: Thu Jan 06, 2022 9:46 am
High C wrote: Wed Jan 05, 2022 10:19 pm Also, no way Dick gets cookies until after dinner. ;)
I know! Right?!!
Or he finishes his homework!!
'I thought Siren was perfect for Joan.'--Stanley Ralph Ross, writer of 'The Wail of the Siren'

My hobbies include gazing at the Siren and doing her bidding, evil or otherwise.

'She had a devastating, hypnotic effect on all the men.'--A schoolmate describing Joan Collins at age 17
User avatar
chrisbcritter
Posts: 0
Joined: Fri Sep 14, 2012 5:59 pm

Re: SCRIPT: "Marsha, The Queen of Diamonds" by Tom Cannan, Jr, and Jack Cash

Post by chrisbcritter »

"Little chum"? I can see a great big NO!!! penciled next to that line.
The stock footage of the bridge collapsing would no doubt have been the Tacoma Narrows Bridge from 1940.
A Batmobile with a power-sliding cockpit canopy that drives under water? Holy Speed Racer! :mrgreen:
If nothing more, at least the villain in this case was written as evil through and through, early-series-Catwoman style.
"To the medical eye, such childish claptrap means only one thing, young man: You need some sleep."
User avatar
bat-rss
Posts: 2
Joined: Sun Apr 05, 2015 5:27 am

Re: SCRIPT: "Marsha, The Queen of Diamonds" by Tom Cannan, Jr, and Jack Cash

Post by bat-rss »

And no Aunt Hilda is a plus. Nothing against Estelle Winwood, but the character seemed out of place. Although I guess she would have been more at home in season three!
"I'm half-demented with whimsical outrage!"
-- The Joker, in a line cut from "The Joker's Epitaph"
User avatar
High C
Posts: 0
Joined: Mon Sep 03, 2012 8:01 am

Re: SCRIPT: "Marsha, The Queen of Diamonds" by Tom Cannan, Jr, and Jack Cash

Post by High C »

bat-rss wrote: Mon Jan 10, 2022 12:27 am And no Aunt Hilda is a plus. Nothing against Estelle Winwood, but the character seemed out of place. Although I guess she would have been more at home in season three!
And, to harken back to your original podcast review, no Aunt Hilda means NO LIZARD!
'I thought Siren was perfect for Joan.'--Stanley Ralph Ross, writer of 'The Wail of the Siren'

My hobbies include gazing at the Siren and doing her bidding, evil or otherwise.

'She had a devastating, hypnotic effect on all the men.'--A schoolmate describing Joan Collins at age 17
User avatar
bat-rss
Posts: 2
Joined: Sun Apr 05, 2015 5:27 am

Re: SCRIPT: "Marsha, The Queen of Diamonds" by Tom Cannan, Jr, and Jack Cash

Post by bat-rss »

Image

Here's Mortimer, in all his shark-jumping glory.
"I'm half-demented with whimsical outrage!"
-- The Joker, in a line cut from "The Joker's Epitaph"
Post Reply